June 9, 2014

Hello Young Lovers Whoever You Are…

I’ve been writing some blog posts about Pre-Marital Agreements, also known as Pre-Nuptial Agreements or Ante-Nuptial Agreements. This document can be worth its weight in wisdom, yet it is so under used.

Recently I was asked to read a new book written by Melinda Eitzen, J. D., Joanna Jadlow, CPA, CFP®, CDFA ™, and Brenda Lee Roberts, M.Ed. LPC, entitled Considering Divorce? Critical Things You Need To Know. These three collaborative law professionals from Texas, a family law attorney, a financial specialist and a licensed professional counselor, have written an incredibly perceptive manual filled with practical wisdom of things one should be aware of when finding themselves in the position of considering a divorce of their marriage.

There is an old bromide in family law that says, Marriage is a Contract, the terms of which are explained to the parties at the point in time that the marriage is terminated. This would be even more funny if were not so true.

While reading this marvelous book of wisdom that outlined the most common mistakes people make at this critical time, and recommending the right things to do, I had a curious insight. This information is exactly what wise souls should know when they are planning to get married. It is exactly the kind of sage wisdom people should be aware of as the terms of agreement for the marriage. It is the kind of wisdom that might well give them a better chance of having a successful marriage never darkened by divorce. It is exactly the kind of sage insight that often comes too late to influence the marriage, and, sadly often too late to soften the divorce.

Not surprisingly, even enlightened souls who have the foresight to seek out a pre-marital agreement not be open to benefit by the full measure of opportunity presented by such an agreement. It is not uncommon that extraneous circumstances may exist, such as owning a family business or having children from a prior marriage that may cause other family members to insist that these contingencies be addressed, and that may be done without creating critical conversations that help each party understand themselves and their partners with the depth that can actually enlighten and enhance each of them to be more open and honest with one another.

This is the hidden treasure, the Holy Grail, that can guide a relationship into those hallowed places that fuel romance novels the great love stories of all time. However, rather than recognizing the merits of intentionally creating such a lofty possibility, it is much easier to imagine something akin to winning the lottery, obtaining the reward without taking the course.

I will have more to say about this in my next post. Stay tuned!

Won’t you take this advice
I hand you like a brother…
Or are you not seeing things too clear…
Are you too much in love to hear…
Is it all going in one ear…
And out the other?

Bruce PeckABOUT THE AUTHOR
Bruce Peck
Attorney

Bruce is one of the founding members of the Collaborative Law Institute.
Back in the Wonder Years, this small group was trying to figure out what a new way of practicing family law might look like. Today the collaborative law concept has exploded, not just throughout the United States, but also internationally. For over thirty years Bruce has continued to hone his skills to provide the highest quality of services to family law clients. He helps good people make tough choices during difficult times.

Bruce is a laid back and easy going person who listens well to others. He is a shameless optimist who can always see possibility and opportunity. Being very curious by nature, he is a voracious reader. His love for words has drawn him into being an avid poet.

Bruce’s skills supports clients interests without alienating their spouse. When the parties reach agreement, it is not under duress. They have the time to discuss all decisions with their attorneys before signing the agreement. Once completed, the stipulated divorce is filed with the court for a default hearing in which neither party, nor their attorneys, ever have to set foot inside a courthouse. Learn more at www.BrucePeckLawOffice.com

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